The Thoughts Continue…

ANNOUNCEMENT: The Lord has provided an opportunity for me to publish my first book. It will be an addendum to my Divorce blog. The title will be: “Divorce Journey: God Used my Pain for His Purpose“. COMING JULY 2019. 

You may follow my “Divorce Is Not The End” FaceBook page for publishing updates and I would love for you to share my Blog and FB page with others who could benefit from it.

Thank you to all of you that read my blog and follow my page. I appreciate you all.


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The Thoughts Continue…

When you’ve been married and become “One” with another person, it is most challenging to train your mind not to think of them. Actually, I have not been able to achieve mastery in this area. My first marriage ended 19 years ago, and my second ended 7 years ago. I still have thoughts of my Ex-husbands daily.

I realize that I may be an unusual case and perhaps others just slam the door shut in their brains and move on! I have often asked God why can’t I just do that? I think I finally know why.

GENUINE LOVE can’t be turned on and off like a light switch. It runs through the very core of your being and trying to “get rid of it” is about as easy as changing your ethnicity.

After divorce, whether we wanted it or not, we move on because life isn’t going to stand still while we process our trauma. However, moving on is by no means an indicator that all is well. I think it is more so an indicator of, “I’m doing what is required of me because life goes on.” Not everyone can even do that! Some people are stifled by the loss of their spouse and need professional help to work through their pain. I say, if that is what is needed, by all means do what you must to begin your journey to wholeness.

Memories are a funny thing…they don’t go away. The best I’ve learned to do is “file them away” when they surface since I cannot erase them from my “Hard-drive” (Brain).

The memories pose a problem. We run the risk of getting stuck in our past, which hinders our forward movement. It is important that we make forward progress each day, even if it’s baby steps. As long as its forward…that’s what matters.

If you are struggling with constant thoughts of your former marriage, I actually think you are pretty normal. I want to encourage you that as time passes and you begin building a new life for yourself and discover your God-given identity, the thoughts will become less and less intrusive.

You will get through this.


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I am a woman who suffered the devastation of divorce and thought my life was over. But, God had another plan...

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